The Lean Green Bean

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Have a Laugh

If you're having a particularly bad day...or you're just  looking for a smile, or even if you simply enjoy laughing at stupid people in general...then this post is for you.

Although I sincerely hope that all of you are having a wonderful Wednesday....I am not. I have a few confessions to make, and I thought I would share them with you so that you could have a laugh at my expense.

Let's start at the beginning shall we? I got to sleep in for an extra hour today because my morning class was canceled...good start right? Well, I stupidly told the car repair shop that  I  would  like to drop my car off at 8am. Not my best idea ever, but it's right across the street, so I slept in til 7:50, threw on a sweatshirt and some shoes and headed out the door with every intention of being back by 8:15 to meet the shower estimate guy that was coming at 8:30. When I got there, they weren't open yet. I peered in the door on several occasions and sat in the parking lot for a good 20 minutes before I saw the lights go on in side (side note: they are SUPPOSED to open at 8). So I walk in, and the lady tells me that Enterprise just called to ask if I was there, and she told them I wasn't. WHAT? are you blind? Your window faces the parking lot and I was clearly sitting out there. So she calls them back and they say "we need to call you back" we wait...and wait....and finally at 8:30 I said, "look- I have to meet this guy at my house...can I go and come back?" So home I go...and then I return...and Enterprise still isn't there, and has not called back. So I call them. And they tell me they are trying to locate a car for me and that it will probably be a "few minutes" but someone will meet there as soon as possible. So I wait some more....40 minutes more, in fact. (Side note: I have not eaten yet, nor have I had my coffee) So I call back..."Oh Lindsay, we've located a car for you and we'll have a team member out to get  you within 20 minutes" Uh hello? I made a RESERVATION FOR 8AM!!! It is now 9:30!! It's not like I had anything better to be doing with my time or anything... So I wait another 30 minutes...finally get picked up....and two hours after my "reservation" I'm on my merry way.

Confession #1: My brain cannot handle the switch from digital to non-digital speedometers.

It turns out that driving a car with this kind of speedometer:

when you are used to this kind:

is proving to be MUCH more difficult than it should be! I caught myself speeding about 19 times on my way to class. I also experienced a few heart palpitations when I glanced up and read the RED numbers on the new speedometer which are actually in km per hour so it initially appeared that I was going 120 mph. LOVELY.

Confession #2: I wear broken sunglasses

Last night, my sunglasses broke. As a general rule, I don't spend more than about $12 on sunglasses because I am constantly scratching them or losing them. As a result, that stupid little pin screw is always falling out, and I can never seem to find it again. So I have an entire collection of one sided sunglasses. BUT it was super sunny today, and I needed to go to class, so did I wear them with only one side?

You bet I did! Did I catch a high schooler laughing at me while we sat at a stoplight? You bet I did! Do I care? Not a bit. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Also, feel free to laugh at my hair. It's a dirty giant poofball today...I decided very early this morning to pick my battles today and fighting with my hair didn't make the cut.

Next up...time for class. As you may or may not know, when I go to class at OSU, I have to park on West Campus...ok well I don't HAVE to...I could've paid $350 to park closer....but let's be real...who has that kind of money? I settled for an $80 parking pass which earns me a nice little spot out in the boonies. As you may or may not ALSO know, I have a HORRIBLE memory regarding where I parked my car. I have spent a somewhat embarrassing amount of time wandering various store and school parking lots trying to figure out where the *!*- I parked my car. As a result of  this handicap, I spent most of the drive to school either adjusting my one sided sunglasses and concocting paranoid stories that involved me coming back from class and not being able to find my rental car. So I took a picture:

Just for good measure. In case I ended up having to call campus security to drive me around the parking lot until I could locate my vehicle. Would that have been super embarrassing or what?! Luckily I snagged a spot in the first row, which I was able  to ingrain in my  memory long enough that I didn't encounter any problems- but the potential was certainly there.

Here comes the  real kicker for the day:
I generally consider myself a pretty smart person...but today I had a blond moment...ok week....ok I've apparently been having a blond SIX weeks. When I first started at OSU, I had to figure out where to park, then I had to RIDE A BUS to class...weird...I like walking. But I don't like walking 3 miles to get  to class, so I spent all this time studying the map, figuring out where my building was, figuring out which bus route went past that building....and I came to the conclusion that I wanted take the Campus Loop South from the parking lot to my building. So that's what I did.  It's been working out just fine, minus the fact that it's a loop, so even though it only took me 10 minutes to get to class, after class I had to get back on the bus and go the rest of the way around the loop which takes about 22 minutes. I've been doing this 3x a week for the past 6 weeks. Suddenly today the lightbulb went off. There's another bus route that picks people up out on west campus....CAMPUS LOOP NORTH.  While I was waiting for my bus today, I was killing time looking at the map and I had this epiphany. CLS and CLN are THE SAME EXACT ROUTE...just one goes one way and one goes the other way. I mean, HELLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LINDSAY?!!?!? Where  have you been? Bottom line: all of this time I could have  been taking the CLS to GET to class and then crossing the street and taking the CLN to GET BACK to the parking lot the same way I came, instead of going ALL THE WAY AROUND THE REST OF THE LOOP!!!! 
...Feeling rather silly, I tried it out today. Worked like a charm. 10 minutes to get to class, 10 minutes to get back.  I used ride home to calculate that I have in fact wasted 3 HOURS of my life over the past 6 weeks sitting unnecessarily on a bus listening to stupid people talking about stupid things. MAJOR BUMMER DUDE!!

So there's my day in a nutshell....happy hump day!




Blogger Kristin said...

lol. That's awesome! I love the sunglasses, too.

October 27, 2010 at 6:07 PM  
Blogger All Things Yummy said...

LOL, too funny. At least you won't be wasting any more hours. :)

October 27, 2010 at 7:37 PM  
Blogger Meg said...

Just wait until Christmas and I will get you one of the back to your car GPS things so you will never loose it again!!!!!

October 27, 2010 at 8:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOVE that you shared these stories! They cracked me up~especially the sunglass story/picture and the bus route story! I have walked in your shoes:)
Btw, I (like you)love finding humor in myself! In fact, I have a sign hanging in our house that says "blessed is she who can laugh at herself for she will always be amused!" Ain't it the truth?!

October 27, 2010 at 10:28 PM  

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